I remember the first time, I danced… With you baby
It was a slow song… The lights… Were so low
I held you so close… I could feel your heart beating next to mine—
Then I kissed you once and my head started spinning
Twice like a merry go round
Three times and I fell so deep in love with you baby
– Howard Hewitt
There are times, even after all these years, I just gaze at you. Amazed at how a simple man like myself was so lucky to find a woman as amazing as you. Luckier to have been smart enough to fall in love with you and luckiest that you felt the same way.
Even when the skies were gray. You would rub me on my back and say, “Baby it’ll be okay”
Now that’s real to a brother like me, baby.
– Method Man
You have always been there for me holding me up when things weren’t so good. Standing right beside me things were. We’ve seen so many of our friends drift apart, either physically or mentally, when things got rough. But not us. Mainly because of your exceptional vision to look beyond the moment to the big picture. To understand that no matter what is in front of us we are better facing it together than separate and I know I’m a better man with you than without you.
You are the only thing that keeps me goin’ You are the only thing, keeps my love alive You are the only thing that I’ll ever need You don’t have to worry, you see, my love is forever.
I am committed to you, you are my heart, you are my soul. There is nothing that could ever cause me to stray, nothing that could steal my heart from you. I love you more today than after our first kiss and I’ll love you more tomorrow.
So you’re with him now. Well I wish you happiness and hope you found what you were looking for. But even you have to admit a love like the one we shared is not so easily forgotten. Even after we walked away from each other a little bit of me remains with you, just like a little bit of you has remained with me. So I wonder, on those nights you lay awake beside him do you hear it? Do you hear my voice saying I love you. We might not be together physically and maybe that’s for the best but we will always share a mental connection no matter who we’re with. Because while we may not have worked out a love like ours will never be broken. As Mr. Spock once said it is not logical but it often times true.
Everyone else dreams when they sleep but when I wake up and your face is the first thing I see I realize you are my dream. All my life I dreamed I would find someone who I would trust with my heart. That person who I want to build a life and grow old with together. Every time I look at you and you smile at me I feel we have been guided by an unknown force to each other. Two hearts connected across time destined to be together. Our connection so strong we can look across a crowded room and see only each other, we can look into each other eyes and have an entire conversation. You bring out the best in me because I want to be the best for you. So it true every time I wake my dream just begins because of you.
A while back I wrote a blog post titled suddenly in the stars in which I discussed the role destinity plays in finding your soulmate. With the season of love upon us I repackaged part of that post to express my current feelings. Now I know repackaging blog post is a bit fugazy but some of you reading this never read the other post so it’s all good. Plus they do it in Holloywood all the time 😄 So enjoy
As Valentine’s Day approaches I find myself pondering the randomness of life. One step to the left or one step to the right could start a series of events that change the course of your entire life. Sometimes that turn leads to that special someone and it becomes clear that everything up until that very moment was in preparation for it. You will never forget the moment you first:
Smiled at each other
Made each other laugh
Held each other’s hand
Kissed each other’s lips
Said I love you to each other
If you have been so lucky, soak it up. Bask in the euphoria, shout it so that all that can hear, show it so that all can see and let no one dampen your enthusiasm for your love.
For those whose turns have led to false starts, fleeting affairs and dead ends. For those who may be experiencing feelings of despair this Valentine’s Day. Fear not remember life is random and while your last turn may not not have led to that someone special the next one or the one after just might. Until then revel in your own awesomeness and awesome you are and take comfort in knowing that your someone special is out there turning too just waiting to turn into you.
For the longest I wondered what if I had walked away from that last argument. Would things have been different? Would we still be together? The answer of course is no. Maybe we would have stayed together another day, a week, maybe a month but the end was as inevitable as the start. Drawn to each other, needing each other really for our own separate and selfish reasons. We were destined to be together, but we weren’t destined to stay together. We were lovers before we had a chance to lay a foundation to build on, to become best friends. Without that it was easy to take each other for granted, to push our own wants and needs to the front of the line. No one would ever confuse our relationship as being built on compromise. Yet there was something there wasn’t there? Something that even long lasting relationships don’t have. An electricity between us, an aura, that distinctive quality that seemed to surround and be generated by us being together. You could feel it, other could sense it, the way they would look at us it was clear that two of us together were something special. But love does not last based on an aura. Love last when two people put in the time and effort to keep it alive. An even if two people truly do love each other if they don’t put in that effort the aura will dim, the love will fade. For us the effort was simply not there. It wasn’t our destiny to stay together, not in this life. But maybe our souls will cross in a future life and we’ll get it right as I suspect we have done in past lives. Destiny simply can not be denied.
Sometimes our love for someone can blind us to their true face. It is at these times God will darken our skies just a little. This is not a test for us but for them, a test to see if they can stand the rain or if it was just words. It is God’s way of washing away those who are not good enough to be in our lives. We may not always understand this and their loss may be painful, but it is only temporary and when our skies begin to brighten again our true soulmate will be waiting for us at the end of the rainbow.