There is only darkness in hate but in love there is light.
As Father’s Day draws to a close I look back on this picture. I am too young to have any memories of this moment but as I look upon it I feel the love that my father always had for me as he holds me in his arms. Protecting me from danger as he would do until the day he left this earth. Now years after his going home to be with the Lord I can still feel myself being protected by him as if I was still being carried in his arms. I still feel his love and while I miss him every day I have no doubt that whenever the need arises in my life he is there for me spiritually. Guiding me and protecting me.
Any two people can fall in love but only those who share a true love will fight for that love when things get rocky. Like all relationships ours has gone through its up and downs and let’s be honest we had our shares of downs lately. But true love is defined by how you handle the down times. Are we willing to work through our problems, listen to each other’s, accept responsibility for our part in what has gone wrong and make the changes required to strengthen our relationship?
So many couples refuse to fight to keep their love, fortunately that’s not the case with us. We value the good times we share with each other and don’t want to lose them. So we fight, we fight for our love and with that said I want you to know that I take full responsibility for lately:
Not hearing your voice
Not being responsive to your needs
Not understanding your concerns
But trust me when I say it’s not because of faded feelings, or desire for you. It’s not because I don’t value you. The truth is I love and value you and the thought of us now more than I ever have. The flame in my heart for you burns as bright as it ever has.
Each day I remember:
The connection I felt the very first moment I kissed you.
How seeing you for the first time took my breath taken away.
How your dazzling smile instantly captivated me, and your mesmerizing eyes drew me in.
I never want to stop being:
Able to smile, laugh out loud and talk to the most intelligent, insightful and unique woman I have ever met.
Able to go to sleep knowing when I wake you will be right there next to me.
You are the most remarkable woman I have ever known, you stir my passion like no other ever has or ever could.
My best friend.
You hold the key to my heart and there is nothing I would not do to make our lives together as fulfilling as possible. Because my love for you is true.
It’s been a long road and along the way I have had many experiences that have shaped the very essence of who I am. But it wasn’t until you walked into my life that I could truly say for the first time I saw clearly what my life was meant for. Today I stand here with you ready to walk a new path in my life. As with any path there will be unknowns and obstacles ahead. But knowing you will be walking the path with me I have no fear, because I have no doubt our love build on trust and mutual respect will carry us through any obstacle we may face.
I promise you that you will always be:
My partner who I walk beside the rest of your life.
My best friend who I will not only listen to but hear
My soulmate who my heart will always beat in unison with.
I say to the world that when I:
Hold your hand.
Hear your voice,
See your smile,
Look into your eyes,
I know a love that I did not think was possible.
It is true that when we are apart I count the minutes until I see you again, until I can hold you in my arms again. Why? Because you and only you:
Bring me happiness
Have awaken my soul
Have given me strength
Are my partner
Are my best friend
Are my soul mate
Are my everything
I love you
I love you.
We must have said those three little words to each other a thousand times and I won’t speak for you but those words when spoken by you to me are so powerful they awaken my deepest emotions.
I’ve often wondered how is it that the sound of three little words can bring me so much happiness? Then it hit me, it’s when I hear you say them I know you mean it.
When I look back at past relationships I realize that when others said I love you they really didn’t mean it? When they said those words, it was the sound of their voice, nothing more nothing less. It was just a sound, a vibration that broadcast itself as a mechanical wave of pressure and displacement through air. Now that’s not romantic and it’s certainly not something I should have given my heart away to.
But with you I love you is not just the utterance of words it’s your actions that bring those words to life. Like when we trade smiles across a room. When you instinctively grab for my hand in a crowd. That look in your eye when you wake up beside me each morning; Small unconscious actions that likely go unnoticed to everyone else but me. Actions that say I love you without any words, no sound passing through the air. I hope my actions say the same to you because there is no doubt in my heart that I love you
Michael Jackson famously asked in one of his songs do you remember? I wonder do you remember the night we first met? It was the end of the year office party and it was crowded as usual. Everyone looked forward to the year-end party, it was the perfect excuse to let off a little steam after another year of 12-hour workdays and never-ending deadlines. Plus, the year-end party was when the company usually announced what our bonuses were going to be and this being a good year financially all our spirits were high with anticipation that our bonuses would be as well. All around the room the usual party small talk, office gossip, laughing and smiling was going on and in a corner with several others there you were.
I knew who you were, I had seen you around, but I didn’t know you. I had been taken with your beauty for a while now. But it wasn’t just your beauty that drew me to you, your reputation as being one of the brightest of the bright and a fighter who was unafraid to think big and push the company to do the same was sexy as hell to me. What was a little confusing tough was just how modest you appeared to be. I mean let’s be real beautiful people know they’re beautiful. smart people know they’re smart and you’re both, but it really did seem like didn’t know it
You couldn’t have been more than twenty feet away from me, but it may as well have been twenty miles. I’ll admit it, despite appearing to be modest you kind of intimidated me. Then you looked across the room right at me and I could swear you smiled, not a huge smile just a quick little one as if you meant only for me to notice it. As the night went on I couldn’t get that little smile out of my head. I looked around the room and found you, surprising all alone, here’s my chance I thought. I summoned all my courage and headed over to introduce myself to you. Be cool, be confident, be self-assured I said to myself. I’m no slouch I’m a pretty good catch myself, you couldn’t just brush me off. Could you? So, it was with an air of confidence that I approached you, but let’s be real that was just on the outside on the inside I was shaking like a child on their first day of preschool after saying goodbye to their mother. The walk over to you seemed to take forever but as I got near you suddenly turned in my direction and there it was again, the little smile from earlier that evening. Before I could say a word, you said hello and our eyes met. That first look into your eyes settled my nerves, it was like I had known you all my life.
We spend the rest of the evening talking and laughing and every so often you would look directly in my eyes and flash that little smile and I knew for sure now that little smile was meant only for me. My whole life I had been looking for someone like you, someone who I would know immediately was my soulmate and that evening I found that person in you.
They say the Law of Attraction uses the power of the mind to translate whatever is in our thoughts and materialize them into reality. If that’s true, then you and I are the result of that law.
For the longest time I dreamed about finding someone with not only your physical beauty but also the quality that truly captures my heart and mind your brilliant intellect. It was obvious from the start that I had been dreaming about you all along.
Dreaming that once I found you we would begin a relationship so passionate everyone around us would feel the heat it generates. And they do!
Dreaming that we would work together to conquer any obstacles in the way of our happiness. And we do!
Dreaming that we would connect on such a level all we needed to do was look at each other and know what the other was thinking. And we do!
I believed in you before I even knew you, you are everything I ever dreamed about. So, you know what? This law of attraction thing must be real, because here you are.
I looked up from my laptop across the living room at you, your head buried in your laptop. Once again, we were together physically in the same room but mentally and emotionally we may as well have been on different continents. What happened to us? Once our passion was so strong all we could do was think about each other. Lately tough we were simply going through the motions.
We had become more committed to our work than we were too each other. In the chase for professional and monetary success we forgot that feeling we had when all we had was each other. The anticipation of seeing each other’s smile. The warmth of being in each other presence. The safety of being in each other’s embrace and the feel of our lips pressed against each other’s. We had convinced ourselves that our happiness could be found in a number and that through hard work we would achieve that number and have everything we wanted in life. Everything that was except what truly made us happy, we forgot about each other.
So, at that moment I put down my work and walked across the living room and pushed your laptop aside. Before you could protest I pulled you close and kissed you like I hadn’t kissed you in a long time. Every bit of passion I had kept hidden from you over the years. Every time I had wanted to tell you how much I loved you but didn’t because I was too busy was all in that single kiss. A single kiss that joined two souls that once were inseparable back together.
You looked at me, a bit confused, and then asked where did that come from? But before I could respond you placed a finger on my lips to quiet me and said you don’t need to say it your kiss already did and yes, I missed us too.
From that day on we have never took each other for granted. We have never let work or the pursuit of money come between us. Sure, we still strived for professional success, but we made sure to keep that chase in perspective. Because after all my love for you is the biggest success of my life.
I’ve never been a morning person and this morning was no different. Groggy eyed I stared into the mirror as I brushed my teeth when something strange happened, the reflection in the mirror appeared to be talking to me.
Have you ever regretted falling in love? Wished you never met her?
I rubbed my eyes and thought okay I didn’t have anything to drink last night and I know I’m tired but this can’t possibly be happening. Then the reflection asked again.
Have you ever regretted falling in love?
Alright I’ll play along, I mean if nothing else this will be a good story to tell my therapist. So, I looked in the mirror and said no not at all. Why not? The reflection asked I mean you were really hurt, you’re in therapy, that last relationship really took a toll on you. Yes, it did I replied I was hurt and I’m not ashamed of being in therapy it’s been really good for me actually. But the moment didn’t break me. Didn’t it? Asked the reflection. No It didn’t I said because I’ve come to realize that moment is but one moment along a longer journey I am on, and I will not be deterred by just one moment. I will continue my journey unafraid of what lies ahead, confident that one day it will lead me to my true love. So, I say again no I have never regretted falling in love. With that the reflection said great I was just checking to make sure you still believed in love because someone out there believes in it too and one day you’re going to find each other. Oh and by the way I’d keep this conversation between you and me, tell your therapist and they just might think you’re losing it.